All the times he did get sex are marked with italics.
This is it. This is pretty much the pentacle of male privilege in the U.S. When a husband whole heartedly believes that he is a victim to unfair treatment by his wife because she denied him sex 26 times in a month.
When a man think his pleasures is more important than a women NOT WANTING TO HAVE SEX and since they are married he has every right to her body and by denying him access to her body she is denying him said right.
He thinks her “excuses” for having sex are also unreasonable. And what are some of those “excuses”?
-She was too tired to have sex.
-She was sick.
-She was too drunk.
-She felt tender (in vaginal region) after having sex the other day.
-They didn’t have enough time because they had somewhere to be. (Which means he was fully prepared to have enough time to get himself off INSIDE his wife while knowing they wouldn’t have enough time for her pleasure)
These are all unreasonable “excuses”
I saw the Reddit thread, and most people were siding with him because she was committing the unacceptable crime of not having sex with him, and even among those who were more sympathetic were starting with ”he did it in an immature way…BUT” and it’s just so depressing how much people hate women that are not ”fulfilling their purpose” of being fucked by men.
The comments on the Buzzfeed link are full of women defending the guy.
It makes me so fucking sick.
Seriously if I were her, I’d leave him. Because that kind of disrespect is unforgivable.
That’d be an insta-divorce.
If there were issues with their relationship that involved a libido mismatch (which it looks like there were), there are much more adult ways to bring up asking your partner if maybe something is wrong, especially if the drop in libido is a recent thing.
Because, like it or not, for most couples (regardless of the gender of the people involved), sex is a big part of their relationship, and when one partner suddenly has a massive drop off in interest, it tends to either raise alarm bells (usually the, “is my partner cheating on me?!” alarm bells), or it just kind of stings for the person who is suddenly being rejected by a partner they used to sync with.
If you’ve been in sync with your partner, and 4 nights a week sex has always been the norm in your relationship, and your partner’s interest suddenly drops to a couple of times per month with no obvious indication as to why, that’s a sign that something isn’t going well somewhere in the relationship and it needs to be talked about.
There isn’t any excuse for the manchild way he went about it, though.
Being upset or hurt about frequent rejections isn’t an excuse to throw a tantrum.
"Hey, I’ve noticed recently that you don’t seem to be interested in sex/being intimate/whatever, is everything okay/is there anything you want to talk about?" is a better place to start. Like an adult might. And not right before your partner leaves on a business trip.
Doing what this douchelord did just proves he’s more a whiny pissbaby than an adult man, and deserves to be left alone with his hand.
See, similar things happened to me a few years back, but with the twist that my wife isn’t a complete douchecanoe; I had a completely shit job at the time that just sapped my will to want to do anything with anyone. The sort of job that left me with the last thought at night of, “If I die in my sleep, I won’t have to go to work tomorrow” and “One turn of the wheel RIGHT NOW, and I’d plunge the car into the river and never, ever have to see anyone at that job again. I’d be free.” and even, “Psst, buddy, you know where the locks and ammo are for the handguns; you’d get out of going back to that job FOREVER that way!”, needless to say it was an extremely toxic company to work for.
I just wanted to basically stare at the wall or stare at a game or anything that didn’t remind me of the real world, because EVERYTHING about the real world always came back to, “Why I can’t quit the soul sucking hell job I have or we’ll become homeless.”
Every last little thing seemed like too much effort or didn’t bring me any sort of satisfaction or pleasure anymore. Basically, it was soul-crushing, situation-induced depression (for which I eventually had to go on meds for to even function).
My libido went from, “Wait…ONLY four times per week, LOLwhat? Are you not feeling well or something?” to, “Ugh…I guess…if I have to. Maybe. Don’t expect too much though. Don’t you, like, have a vibrator or something?”
Since my wife is not a giant pissbaby, or a tantrum throwing child, her first reaction wasn’t, “OMG U SHITLORD, WHAT’S UR PROBLEM! I’M A DELIGHT YOU SHOULD ALWAYS STILL WANT ME EVERY TIME I ASK!” and send me passive aggressive spreadsheets, it was to ask me if anything was wrong/bothering me.
Which it was, and we talked about it like adults, and she’d had no idea I was as miserable as I was because of that nice, well paying job at a super shitty company. We ended up working out a way that I’d be able to quit that place and we’d have enough money saved up that I could take 6-8 months to find a different job, and amazing, once the ‘problem’ I was having was fixed, everything bounced back to the way it was.
I don’t care if it’s long, I’m reblogging this for Calleo’s commentary, because all of the ridiculous commentary on the article, on Reddit, and elsewhere comes down to people THINKING they are saying this, but really just being misogynistic assholes.
"Give and take" does not mean "sometimes you have to have sex even if you don’t want to" FFS.